The Eye of Venus
Have you ever heard the legend of the Eye of Venus?
✽✽✽
This performance costume was unusually adorned with several rows of deep violet embellishments. Whenever the skirt fluttered through the air with my movements, my eyes could catch tiny points of light flashing across them, shimmering like the morning sun scattered over the surface of a stream.
“Crystal is naturally colorless and transparent. But when trace elements find their way into its structure, they can tint it in all manner of colors.” Noticing that my gaze had never once left the row of decorations, my coach’s husband, German, explained from beside me.
“Different elements produce different changes, giving each crystal its own distinctive hue.”
His somewhat rough hands gently brushed over the performance costume he had made himself. Unlike my stern coach, Viktoriya, he had always watched over us children with a gentle gaze. Like a second father to me... No. Like my own father. “I designed it to be especially dazzling this time, to match the music you chose. With this costume complementing your performance, I’m certain you’ll capture everyone’s attention.” German confidently thumped his chest as he made his promise. Back when we were choosing the music, he had also been the very first to applaud my suggestion. “Even I can’t help losing myself in these beautiful decorations... Thank you, Sir German. I promise I won’t let all your hard work go to waste.” “It’s time to begin practice, Karin. Every minute and every second before the competition is precious. I don’t want you to miss a single opportunity to train.” Viktoriya swept her bangs behind her ears with a headband. Her silver-white hair, tinged with gold, swayed beneath her ears with every step she took. That was how she looked whenever she became serious. Ever since retiring from competition herself, Viktoriya had devoted everything she had to nurturing the next generation of gymnasts. I had heard that, at the height of her career, she was known for the extraordinarily high standards she set for herself, as well as for her brilliant and remarkably consistent results. When I first proposed this piece of music, I had expected someone as uncompromising as her to reject my choice. Yet after listening to it, all she did was murmur: “Perhaps this could create an unexpected kind of impact... Hmm, never mind. If this is the choice you wish to make, then I’ll help you polish it to perfection.” Strict, yet willing to trust her student’s decisions... Was that simply the kind of person she was? Sometimes I found her difficult to read. But one thing I knew for certain: throughout the athletic career that still lay ahead of me, she was someone I could trust—and someone worth following. “Understood, Lady Viktoriya. Thank you for coaching me today as well.” After carefully putting the costume back into its bag, I stood and began the day’s practice. The competition was fast approaching. Every training session completed meant one fewer session remained. I had to focus on what was right in front of me. The competition I would be entering this time, the All Japan Junior Rhythmic Gymnastics Championships, was one of the most important junior competitions in Japan. A sufficiently high placement could earn a gymnast selection as a national development athlete, or even open the path toward representing Japan at the Youth Olympic Games and stepping onto the international stage. Last year, I had won gold at the All Japan Junior Championships and passed the subsequent training-camp selection, earning a place as one of Japan’s representatives for the FIG Junior World Championships. I was still considered one of the leading contenders for the title this year. But there was a reason the federation reevaluated its development roster every year. A gymnast’s condition and ability could change drastically from one year to the next, influenced by countless physical and psychological factors. If you could not prove yourself again, then no matter how brilliantly last year’s medal gleamed, it would become nothing more than a heavy weight around your neck—binding you to past glory and keeping you from facing who you were now. I had seen far too many athletes fall from the heights they once occupied. That was why I never allowed myself to grow complacent. Official rhythmic gymnastics competitions consist of four apparatus events: ball, clubs, hoop, and ribbon. Today, our focus was ribbon—my trump card, and the apparatus I handled best. I rose onto my toes and stepped into the center of the floor. The moment the music began to pour from the speakers, I moved exactly as I had countless times in practice: every angle, every height, every amplitude reproduced down to the smallest detail, until the final note faded through the training hall. “Karin, there is something I want to know. In this performance... to whom are you trying to convey this ‘story’?” After the run-through ended, Viktoriya asked me with an unusually solemn expression. Her voice reached me through the violent rise and fall of my chest as I struggled for breath, fresh beads of sweat sliding from my forehead and dampening my face. “You noticed, Lady Viktoriya...? I should have expected nothing less from you.” “It was only a faint sense of resonance. Still, I have to admit... this is quite an ambitious challenge you’ve chosen for yourself, Karin.” Perhaps my vision had blurred from how violently I had been moving my head moments earlier. Because for just an instant, I could have sworn I saw the corners of Viktoriya’s lips rise ever so slightly. “But if you intend to complete this ‘story,’ your current technique still isn’t enough. Come. We’ll reinforce these elements again.” ✽✽✽ “Over here, over here! These are the seats Karin saved for us!” “Whoa—! The view is amazing! You can see the center of the floor perfectly from here!” Momoko and Miyako exclaimed excitedly, while Kaoru and Ema followed behind them. “As expected of Lady Karin! Even her choice of seats is flawless. Not even the VIP seats I could get through the Kasuya family’s connections could compare! Ahh—just what isn’t Lady Karin capable of?” Ema fiddled with the camera hanging around her neck, taking several test shots toward the arena while rambling away in blissful fangirl ecstasy. What is with these people? Every single one of them looked completely relaxed. Compared with them, Kaoru felt especially awkward. She had watched plenty of competitions before, but most of them had involved ball sports or wrestling. Something this... elegant was a first for her to see in person. She couldn’t help feeling nervous. The violent pounding of her heart seemed to strike directly against her eardrums. Strange, really. She wasn’t even the one competing. Karin herself probably wasn’t half as anxious as she was. Kaoru remembered what Karin had said when she invited them to watch: “This national championship isn’t only an important competition for advancing my career. It’s also... a letter I want to send to all of you. If you can, I want you to be there—to witness my resolve with your own eyes.” Her resolve...Kaoru swallowed the chaotic thoughts clogging her throat all at once. If she was going to witness something this important, then the least she could do was face it wholeheartedly. “But why did Karin only invite us to watch the final apparatus?” Miyako asked. “Rhythmic gymnastics has four events—ball, clubs, hoop, and ribbon, right?” “Well, obviously that’s because...” Momoko answered with complete confidence. “She wanted to save the best part for us!”
Ema stepped forward and slung an arm around Momoko’s shoulder, giving her an approving look that seemed to say, You get it.
“Lady Karin has... always been like that. She works tirelessly where no one can see her, all by herself, because she only wants everyone else to see her at her brightest.”
“But maybe all athletes are like that. Strong... and lonely at the same time.”
“...”
Kaoru stared silently at the girl before her, someone who seemed to understand Karin better than she did. She forcibly buried the indescribable sting in her chest somewhere deep inside.
“Ladies and gentlemen, the ribbon event will begin shortly. Please take your seats as soon as possible and refrain from leaving the spectator area during the competition.”
Everyone held their breath and turned their attention toward the center of the arena. The gymnasts appeared one by one according to their starting order. On the screen, each athlete’s scores from the previous apparatus were displayed clearly. Since the order reflected their current overall rankings, it did not take long for them to find Karin’s name.
“Huh?! Second place? That’s amazing! And she’s barely behind first!”
“You’re right! And the gap starts getting much bigger from third place onward.”
“At this rate, Lady Karin should have no trouble making this year’s national development roster!” Ema enthusiastically showered them with explanations about the athletes and the competition, but Kaoru kept her eyes fixed on the scoreboard.
“She’s not the kind of person who’d ever be satisfied with where she is now.”
When the announcer finally called number fifteen, a gymnast stepped onto the floor in violet, her silver-white hair following behind her. Those unmistakable colors made her impossible to overlook—as though her very presence were declaring that not a single person in the arena would be permitted to look away.
—And so, the stage belonging to Karin Sakuraue began.
✽✽✽
The first note sounded.
I transformed my body into a wave, unfolding from my head, through my chest, and down to my abdomen. Slowly rising onto my toes, I flicked the wrist holding the ribbon stick, sending a succession of delicate waves through the ribbon and allowing the still-faint light to flow between its curves.
For my ribbon routine, I had chosen “Lux Aeterna” from Requiem for a Dream.
It was the music of a cautionary tale. A story about people who became consumed by the gaze of others and by society’s definition of success; who lost themselves to addiction, hurt the people they loved, and ultimately surrendered every possibility their futures might once have held.
As gymnasts, we yearn for love.
We yearn to be seen.
We yearn to become the center of everyone’s attention.
And so we restrict our diets to maintain our bodies. We repeat the same movements until exhaustion. We cannot allow even the angle of a fingertip to stray from perfection—all so that we might conform to what the world has decided is “beautiful.”
Because only then can we enter people’s sight.
Only then can all our effort finally be seen.
“We spend the mere handful of years we have lived desperately chasing applause; chasing affection; chasing achievement. We mistake the numbers on a scoreboard for our own worth—for the only thing we possess. Even a single decimal point can become the dividing line of an entire career.”
“Perhaps before we ever truly come to understand the ‘self,’ that empty space has already been filled by the judgments of others.”
“And as we stand here now, can we remain awake within this torrent of judgment? Can we still remember the dream that first brought us onto this floor?”
The music reached its first swell. I launched into a switch ring leap, then transitioned upon landing into a passage through the circular pattern of the ribbon, threading my body through the loop without allowing its trajectory to collapse. So far, everything had gone exactly as it had in practice.
The true challenge lay ahead: the rapid rotations and the blind throws and catches outside my field of vision. If I could complete every section successfully, there was little doubt that a score somewhere around 24.5 would be enough to claim the championship.
This was the challenge Viktoriya had given me.
“It will allow what you wish to express to reach their hearts more completely—but only if you execute every movement flawlessly.” She had left the final decision—whether to follow this plan or not—in my hands. But how could I possibly turn away from a weapon that could bring the performance that much closer to perfection?
Crystal is naturally colorless and transparent. Yet through the interference of trace elements, it can take on countless colors. Different elements create different transformations, giving each crystal its own distinctive hue.
We are much the same as those pure, colorless stones.
Little by little, this world colors our lives.
And the color that belonged to me was violet.
Amethyst carries the meaning of “never intoxicated.” Known as the Eye of Venus, it is said to possess the power to see the desires hidden within the human heart.
It was almost as though that name itself had bestowed an expectation upon me— that I could remain clear-minded in a world like this, and that I could give voice to the fate we all shared.
My body flowed from one rotation into the next. The ribbon soaring through the air traced shape after shape, drawing our ideals again and again—the image held within the heart of every gymnast, unique to each and every one of us.
“Even if only for a fleeting moment, we can still choose to shine for ourselves.”
The final note echoed throughout the arena. And the instant its lingering resonance disappeared, applause began to break out here and there—before swelling into a torrent that filled the entire space.
✽✽✽
“That was incredible! I swear I could barely find a moment to breathe through the entire competition!”
“I know! Every single gymnast was amazing. You can really tell this is a national-level championship. But Karin really is incredible—she managed to stand out even among athletes that good.”
“Once Karin’s finished with the award ceremony, the five of us should go celebrate together!”
Momoko and Miyako were already planning where they would go afterward, while Ema furiously hammered away at her phone keyboard. Even from the corner of her eyes, one could see the faint redness that remained.
“This competition was unbelievable! This could completely shatter the record for Lady Karin’s best performance! I have to upload my review to the ‘Hanaikada Falling Blossoms ☆ Dance Upon the Water’ forum right away...”
“Sorry to keep you waiting, everyone—!” Karin approached the girls, now changed back into her usual clothes. Beneath the partially zipped collar of her tracksuit, the gold medal hanging around her neck occasionally caught the light.
“Karin!! You’re here! We have so much to tell you—!” Three of them immediately crowded around Karin as she emerged from the arena, pouring out everything they had felt while watching the performance. Kaoru, meanwhile, quietly reached into her bag and pulled out the little reward she had prepared for her.
“Here. Good work out there. And, uh... it was amazing.”
“Wow! Mint chocolate milk! Thank you, Kaoru.”
Karin eagerly pushed the straw through the top. The cool sweetness seemed to wash away all the exhaustion of the competition at once.
“Kaoru, you watched me properly, didn’t you? What did you think?”
“O-Of course I did! I never took my eyes off you!”
The truth was that Kaoru was hardly alone. There probably hadn’t been a single person in that arena who could tear their eyes away from Karin. And yet, even though her extraordinary technique and artistry had left them spellbound, as mere spectators, they still could not fully understand the meaning behind the story she had performed—a story created especially for the athletes standing upon that floor.
“Karin, there’s something I want to ask... What were you really trying to tell us back there?”
At Kaoru’s question, Karin gave her a knowing smile.
Then, looking directly into her eyes, she slowly spoke those words:
—Have you ever heard the legend of the Eye of Venus?
留言